Without Sun

Its been 4 days there was sun in the sky...I have obviously liked it because coming from delhi, this kind of weather is very less to see. But today suddenly this looks so gloomy to me...The day started late and everything was fine but why I m not happy. This is so not me!

I dont know if I am doing it in the right way.. Infact I don't know whats the right way..But I know I am doing something without any clue of its consequences...Its too early, way too early....I am unable to realise anything...Dont want to make it a farce...just want to keep it simple...But I know it's not gonna be one smooth walk...I m on a cliff it seems....Just one thought for the moment, wanna go to an unknown place amongst unknowns...

Jalebiiii .....!!

I was on my way to take my watch back from the Titan showroom in the evening which stopped running one day and the shopkeeper said he need to change the machine and lot of other things needs to be done in that. Seems there was a major technical fault! Before going to the shop, I thought the maximum it require would be a new cell but I was wrong.

Anyways, so on my way back I saw this chaat corner shop where there was a huge crowd as always. I remember once my friend had told me that it’s a good one and worth a try. I dint want to experiment new things so I stuck with samosa and Jalebi. I ordered him to pack it so that I would enjoy it peacefully in my room. There were two hot samosa's and only 500 gm of jalebi's. I remember how I was running impatient for my order. It was an open jalebi corner in that shop, what held my breath was a large cast-iron wok filled with steaming oil to the brim and the sweet maker or 'halwai' deftly swirling and twirling patterns with the 'jalebi' batter into the hot oil and finally dipping it into the sweet-sugary liquid. The view was mouth waterinnnnngggggg....!!!!!

I couldn't resist opening the pack till my room therefore I just opened it midway. As I held the jalebi in my hand I dint know I was on my way to heaven.. Imagine: sweet and crunchy ring of sunshiny jalebi in your hand-what more can you ask from life!!!! I gently put the hot crisp and sweet-liquid filled jalebi in my mouth and my eyes were automatically closed and I opened them only when I realized I m to cross a road when this car was honking at me...I just found my way and started walking down but my pace got slowed because I wanted to give all my attention to that piece of only luxury at that point of time with me.

I enjoyed it after a long time and I distributed the rest to my friends back at hostel and they were so happy too.

The piping-hot,sinfully-sweet,crispy,flavor-full and mouth-watering Jalebi is enough to make me addicted than any other drug :P

Researching life

I have this stupid "Writing and Communication workshop" tommorow and I am supposed to give a powerpoint presentation in an area quite, nah..absolutely new to me and its half past midnight and in the midst of preparing the slides what I can be caught doing is reading old friends blogs and having a strong urge to write one. So here I go...

This is the age when we (all those of my age) have almost finished our studies and have started our new venture of life. Few like me can still ,I would say Enjoy the student life,by being the Research Scholars riding the same old bycycle,sipping the same chai in a tea-stall and enjoying the simplicity of the complicated life.

I was reading a friends post how he was describing his never-ending love for his dear friends and family and some realities of life. Really,its the time when we are cherishing friendship,cherishing life, the moments spent with our near and dear friends. Life has taken us to completely far-off geographical regions in the company of linguistically and culturally different people, some in abroad and some in different states of their own country. Indeed its those memories, which are keeping us alive,its those people who are making you smile and its those people you are so sure to feel good to talk to. Those are your friends and family.There is one more category of people which we dont talk to because somehow our communication was stopped but we still think about them in our minds only to feel good and at the same time bad about it for now you dont know whether that person is still the same or not?

We think a lot sometimes...There's no machine so far developed by which you can know what goes in other person's mind. Why do we hesitate so much? Why do we think so much? Why dont we say truth sometimes? Why dont we express our thoughts sometimes? Because of which we suffer sometimes..

If you ever need a friend,I will be there.
These were the last words..Are you still my friend?
Can I ever know its answer?

Still..Life goes on :)

So this is how you enjoy?

The title of my post is a very innocent question asked to a newly formed friend of mine.
Pat comes her reply," Yea, Isnt that cool?"

Now I just smiled to it and we changed the topic. I m talking about the social habits in us like "Drinkin and Smokin". Pics of people hanging out with a glass of alcohol and a ciagrette in other hand is so common. Being "social" as they say comes only if they have to do all this? I just wonder if thats really exciting..I find excitement even in a simple tea which is served on a roadside chai ki shop..

I met this guy in train on my way to Bangalore, he works in Infosys, I saw him going out of our chamber every one hour.Every time it took him around 10 minutes to return back and he was always carrying this smell of smoke with him. He tried his best to not let anyone having a hint about his habit by chewing mint or chewing gum but I was smart enough to trace :P and couldn't resist myself and asked him why he smokes this much? ( I know I shouldn't be asking that but coudn't help).

Initially, he was surprised as to how I came to know about it as we hardly talked in the whole journey but afterwards he shared me the reason how he survives working so hard all day in front of the screen and then their only stressbuster is used to be a pack of ciagrettes.

I really felt pity on him and smiled (again) secretly...

I dont really find it offensive to drink or smoke.. but, sometimes its something you can't help but do and otherwise its the only thing you can do.

The choice is yours~

Can engagement pull away friends?

We make a group of four and like any adolescent and fresh college goer excitingly named our group name as MAGN. The first letter of the names gave this group such a name where G for sure was me . It's been seven and half years now that we know each other and we know everything. I remember how we used to be in college and how we all have in Darwin's term-Evoluted for better..mmm..

Amongst us, Amita and Neetika were nerdy kinds, always in books or in the library, Mona and I were li'l chilled out ones but because of them we too started visiting the library sometimes and eventually developed interest for those expensive foreign author books. The ultimate destination nevertheless used to be the canteen where we couldn't stop ourselves sipping tea and enjoy samosa's, momos or bhelpuri. Chatting and laughing, Nicknames to last bench games, Cultural rehearsals to love proposals, professors mimicry to girls fight, Project views to exam screws...we did it all till dawn. Indeed they are my Best friends for life. We have supported each other during some pretty tough times and handled lots of disagreements. After classes/practicals that used to last till 4 or 5 every evening, everyone used to rush to their homes but we used to keep sitting in the college either in the canteen or in the lawns else in the rock gardens chatting endlessly. Obviously we all were singles and 50 % were ready to mingle. Never did it occur to me that it would be Amy first. I always had in my mind that Amy and Neetz would go for arrange marriage given that the personalities they were. I remember how simple we were except for mona who always were a babe and had the best dressing sense and so canny amongst four of us. :) I was a complete tomboy..infact a boy. My mom always treated me like a chota-bacha and therefore my hair was always cut short into a typical boy-cut style. I enjoyed it too since I was away from all the nitty-gritties that gals used to have and had a single free and creative soul plus no one dared to say anything to menot even Harpal Singh!!!

Harpal Singh : He was my classmate from class IV to VIII and this incident happended to me in VII class if my gray cells work properly. I was monitor of the class and there was some inspection in school. Classes were suspended and I had to mind the class so as to have pin-drop silence in order to earn some praise from the class-teacher. I was trying to be at my best but certainly Harpal was not! He was boisterous that day and wasn't ready to be in control. Whenever I passed away from his desk, he started talking with his bench mate. Whole class was silent of my fear but he was the odd one out. I asked him to stay quiet but he ignored. I wrote his name on the black-board and asked him to go out of the class. I dont remember exactly what happened but we indulged into haatha-payi. After some verbal scores he held me with my collar that left me stood aghast. I had to come back stronger as now it was about my pride and position in front of class. I dont know what came into my mind but I held his turban and unfolded it. To which he started crying and became harmless. I know that was cruel of me but I had to go for self defense. He never said anything to me ever may be he got scared!

After graduation, all four of us got separated professionally and got busy with our lives. Still we were bonded from heart and always tried to meet on weekends or other. I knew if anyone was ever going to marry first it wouldn't be me. and its trueee!!! Amy just got engaged last month and Heavens, I cant believe it still!!! The feeling is not sinking but it will :) I can see how life's changing..priorities,preferences,likes,dislikes...

It's a great feeling to see your buddy getting married to the person she loves..yeah it's a love-marriage!!!! Who wouldn't be happy after being the part of entire process of ups and downs and finally coming out with flying colours to finally approve the relation with parents. All's well that ends well.

I googled arrange marriage and here comes the result in wikipedia," Factors considered in arranged marriage match-making in India" Following are some bullet points:

1. Caste


2. Reputation


3. Vocation


4. Wealth


5. Religion


6. Horoscope


7. Diet


8. Height


9. Age


10. Language


11. Miscellenous
    

But "Love" was not in the list anywhere.. Does it not matter to parents at all? What is it then?

Anyways,things are going smoothly and she's all busy in shopping for wedding. Now, all that she talks is either about her fiance or about them. Oftenly, our plans of going out gets cancelled at the eleventh hour because suddenly Mr. Right takes the lead and we are left to just -Understand. Her shopping list got longer and her companion got changed. Now its no girls thing but a boy is rocking the charts. Hmm.. I may be sounding like a jealous or a selfish woman but I am getting used to of such habit as few other female friends of mine getting into the same practice.

Whats my problem? In no way I m a perfect person but what I feel is one has to try to be little considerate and should have/give her/his own space. All of us have got just 24 hours a day. But

Its a matter of prioritizing our life to the things that are really important.

Isn't she doing the same? She is acting correctly on her priority list and being a true friend I should be in all peace to that.

It leaves me wondering: Does life takes a head spinlike this? It's amazing to see how one suddenly change their preferences and move towards the only soul left..Am I being too sarcastic? I m just wondering if I m overthinking things.

After all the thinking process I came to a conclusion: Friends must realise that their relationship with their engaged /married friend has to change too. Their engaged friend is going through a lot of changes and should spend the good part of their time with their partners and be given the time to bond together in pre and post marriage scenario,even if it is a love marriage. Every wife wishes to feel special and wants her husband's attention and not feel ignored in front of his friends and similarly each husband wants his wife to shower him with the attention that only a wife can and make him feel all important and the most important part of her life rather than just going out with her friends..

So I guess, If I happen to have this much of understanding I must be called a good friend :D and yeah,

~ Congratulations
Much excited for the Wedding!!

P.S : As I complete writing this post I get the invitation for a night stay at her home.I knew it!! Yay!!

Not Today-but tomorrow

It was 11 pm and usual after the dinner scene when my mom was upto keeping things back into place and stuff. I was watching t.v apparently with my brother actually none of us were watching it seriously as he was busy texting and I was ear-plugged to my favourite tracks and I appeared a moron that time to my mother. I guess it was the show Aap ki Adalat on India TV where Digvijay Singh was the guest of honour and was replying to Rajat Sharma's questions in the talk show. I hardly paid much heed as I was in some other world.

I was tapping feets and enjoying the music and suddenly had the urge to go outside and walk on the streets or may be go for a long long drive only to stop at the road side tea stalls for my favourite drink chai or coffee probably and enjoy the rain that is blessing us these days all over the country or dance continuoulsy for quite some time or worse... singing loud enough to let everyone know about it...I think these are the after-effects of having been lived in kharagpur that you become energised only in late-hours. Its 12 and I feel now the time starts but everyone around me is off to bed..uhmm..!

I just saw my mom irritated on some thing, must be a very simple common thing and sharing it with papa, bhai busy with the texting..I notice him using phone more than required frequency now-a-days, guess he's a girlfriend..Well talking on same line, I would like to show my disgust for those who go mobile-crazy and always busy with phone when they have people (as in girl friend/boy-friend whatever the case may be) in their life..Anyways...

I m still enjoying my music unaffected of things at home. Back at kgp I went dull during my last few months there but now again I m full of lists..I wanna learn dance..I wanna go for long long drives..I wanna explore places..I wanna ride a bike or at least sit on a bike :P..wanna work really well and earn good amount..hmm...!

I have my own set of things to do..a different sphere of understanding and not many would understand though..including guys at my home. They think I am from Venus, I guess I am....

I wanna stay myself! Just myself.

~Full of Life~

Nothing is better than something

The difference that comes.. makes things take for granted..
The things that were, the time that was...for all transformed into a memory of past..
Still it exist..atleast somewhere definitly..
Hope it emerges one day...

Shan-e-Ghalib

Aa gayii yaad sham dhalte hii
bujh gayaa dil chiraagh jalte hii

khul gaye shahr-e-Gham ke darvaaze
ek zaraa sii havaa ke chalte hii...


kaun thaa tuu ke phir na dekhaa tujhe
mit gayaa Khvaab aankh malte hii

tuu bhii jaise badal saa jaataa hai
aks-e-diivaar ke badalte hii